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Post by kalipso2 on May 20, 2015 12:39:22 GMT -5
Until this past Saturday, I was one of those people. My birds have been around each other for over 8 years. While they've always had separate cages, sometimes that doesn't even matter.
I have Gator (quaker dna male, 15+ years old), Cricket (quaker non-dna tested, 8 years old) and Alistair (parakeet, male, 10 years old). The breeder I got Cricket from said I should test but I really wanted him to be a boy so I never tested him and in the 8 years I've had him he has never laid any eggs...until last week.
I couldn't believe my eyes when I came home from work last Wednesday to find an egg at the bottom of Cricket's cage (who I will still refer to as he/him). I was totally bummed but it explained the overactive hormones he's been displaying. My nice baby has turned into a cyclone of bites and screams. He charges at my face when I try to clean his cage. He attacks my hands when I feed him. He stopped flying to me or even coming out of his cage. I figured this behavior would go away after he laid a couple of eggs but so far it hasn't.
My parakeet, Alistair, LOVED Cricket. He would sit outside Cricket's cage and just stare at him for hours. If Cricket flew to me, Alistair flew to me too even though he's not tame. He would occasionally hang out with Gator but Alistair's love for Cricket was undeniable.
And this is where I screwed up....
I knew Cricket was a girl. I knew he was hormonal. I knew Alistair liked hanging off Cricket's cage. Cricket has been attacking the cage every time I walk by. I thought Alistair would be quick enough to get away if Cricket charged at him.
I was DEAD wrong.
Saturday morning I wake up at 7:30am to Gator squawking. Then Cricket starts and Alistair's chirping begins. I took off their covers and I notice Alistair is clawing at his face and moving it back and forth like something was stuck. I walked up closer and see his face full of blood. I grab him with a towel and look at his face. His beak is gone. I call the vet saying I'm coming in with an emergency. Sure enough, Alistair's entire top beak is gone. They had me leave him there so they could clean him up and evaluate him. I came back 6 hours later to come get him.
When I walked into the incubator room, thank God I was alone. I burst in to tears. I didn't know how a bird this small could live thru the trauma that used to be his face. The Dr. walked in on me crying and promised me it looked worse than it was. He said Alistair had enough strength in h is jaw to still crack seeds. He told me to let Alistair bite me so I could see and yes, the bite was good. I asked if it would be best for me to put him down and the Dr. said, "No! Give him a chance to fight!!" So I brought him home. The Dr. said he'd have a better chance learning to eat if I had him home since seed is all Alistair knows and he isn't tame, hand feeding and mushy foods would be wasted. He gave me finch and canary seed which would be easier for Alistair to eat. He told me not to hold Alistair back. If he wants out of his cage, let him.
Alistair only stayed in his cage a few minutes before he was out flying to Gator's cage. I put new food in Alistair's cage and he flew back and tried to eat. I don't think he was actually eating because I didn't hear any seeds cracking. He flew to the bottom of his cage and search for food. He flew to Gator's treat bowl looking for food so I decided to make him some spinach, cous cous and scrambled egg hoping he'd at least TRY the food. It looked like he picked at it but I don't know if he ate anything.
Sunday was more of the same. Alistair seemed more upbeat. He even chirped a few times! I took a nap in the afternoon and when I woke up, Cricket had laid another egg *sigh*. Alistair tried hanging outside Cricket's cage but I made him stay away. Monday morning Alistair was chirping more and I felt confident that he was going to be fine so I made a check-up appointment for him on Tuesday.
I got home from work Monday night and Alistair was gone.
I was so sad. I took him right away and buried him next to his girlfriend in my parent's yard. I called and cancelled his appointment for Tuesday. Last night his Dr. called me to see how I was. He really, really thought Alistair was going to make it. He had hoped he would be a small part of Alistair's success story.
While I am grieving over the loss of Alistair. I am SO angry with Cricket. I know I shouldn't be. He was being a hormonal bird. I'm more angry at myself for not watching over my birds more carefully. Cricket and Alistair grew up together, not sharing a cage but having access to each other for over 8 years. Alistair was fast. I had seen Cricket lunge at him before but Alistair was always flying away.
I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER!!! |
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Post by aaron on May 20, 2015 13:25:01 GMT -5
Gosh, what a tough story... I'm really sorry for your loss. Definitely scary. Don't beat yourself up about it-- won't change anything and this is a mistake that is easy to make. Really sorry you have to go through this.  I only have one bird and this is part of why, because I am afraid of having to manage the dynamics of more than one-- seems like there's always a chance something will go horribly wrong pretty much no matter how attentive you are. It would definitely be hard not to feel some anger toward Cricket in that situation. Hang in there! |
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Post by easttex on May 20, 2015 13:26:36 GMT -5
Hi Kris. That sounds like it was a very intense experience, and I am sorry for your loss.
I've had a multiple bird household for almost a year now, and my grey doesn't care for my quaker. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, neither is much of a flyer and they depend on me for their transport. A couple times when I've carried Peppy past Allie, he looked like he wanted to join her on her perch, but I've been able to head that off. If they had been happily coexisting for years, as yours did, though, I'm sure I would have taken the situation for granted, too.
It is brave and generous of you to share your story. I'm sure it will do some good for others to read it, as it has been for me, painful as it must be for you to recount.
RIP Alistair. Try to forgive Cricket, and yourself.
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Post by cnyguy on May 20, 2015 20:16:31 GMT -5
So sorry for your heartbreaking experience. May all your good memories of Alistair be a comfort to you.
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Post by Jan and Shah on May 21, 2015 0:17:57 GMT -5
I was saddened to read your story. Please don't beat yourself up over it. These things happen. Cricket was just being hormonal and couldn't help but attack. You think you know your animals but you never really do. Sending hugs your way.
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Post by kalipso2 on May 21, 2015 7:19:19 GMT -5
I'm trying really hard to forgive Cricket but I just don't have it in my heart right now with Alistair's death being so new. I will continue to feed him and talk to him and open his cage. I just don't know if I'll ever be able to hold him again.
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Post by easttex on May 21, 2015 8:12:57 GMT -5
That's entirely understandable at this point. It's very raw, and you can't rush anything. I'm posting a link for your consideration. I'm not familiar with this particular group, but I think very highly of Cornell U's bird-related programs. Some people have zero interest in this sort of thing, and some people find it helpful to talk to knowledgeable strangers. www.vet.cornell.edu/Org/PetLoss/ |
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Post by aaron on May 21, 2015 10:24:23 GMT -5
Totally understandable to be feeling the way you do toward Cricket. I don't blame you one bit.
When our bird misbehaves (obviously what you've experienced here is on a different level entirely) I try to remind myself of the plight of the captive parrot.. It's a tough life they live, really. They don't really belong in a human world, but they aren't able to join a birdly world, and they are basically being asked to go a lifetime of ignoring their natural impulses as best they can to try to fit into our lifestyles and schedules... They're all good little beings with good hearts, just trying to figure out their way in this bizzare world they find themselves in...
That being said, they can be quite infuriating at times. And their actions can be appalling, and insulting, and confusing. It's really tough for us humans too. Sometimes I wonder if humans should even keep birds as pets at all, and generally I conclude we should not, from a philisophical standpoint... but they can be so amazing and wonderful, and I wouldn't trade Cupcake for anything. When it's good, it's really good... So who knows.
Anyhow, rambling a bit here... I hope you and Cricket find a way to be close again, but I can certainly see how that would be incredibly difficult. We're always here if you want to talk about it.
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Post by siobhan on May 21, 2015 13:54:43 GMT -5
Jade has not killed anybody but she has done damage to Benjy. The toes of both feet are crippled and some are nubs thanks to her. She pulled out his entire tail with one yank once. I have been enraged at her more than once for this. Both tiels have had their toes bitten. She's tried biting Maggie's feet, but those big tough pigeon toes can take it, where the toes of budgies and tiels cannot. Jade has never even broken the skin on Maggie. I've considered rehoming Benjy for his own safety, because he won't stay away from Jade. I tried moving him into the room with Ringo Starling, but both of them were horribly unhappy. Nobody in their right mind would take Jade herself or I'd have tried to rehome her a few times because I was so angry and fed up with her nonsense. She's lived with us since January 2005 and is only marginally more tame than the very first day in spite of the combined efforts of both of us and in spite of having absolutely no reason to be so aggressive and reactionary.
You will eventually find yourself forgiving Cricket. You may never feel quite the same about her, but you will forgive her eventually. You have to remind yourself that parrots are wild creatures. They are not domesticated. They act and react according to that wild instinct and to Cricket, Alistair was a threat to the eggs (which may be fertile; have you checked?). The eggs must be protected and defended at any cost.
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Post by julianna on May 21, 2015 14:36:43 GMT -5
I am truly sorry for your loss. It is a horrible thing to go through both for you and for your birds. Cricket was only doing what nature has taught her and that is to protect her young no matter what. Please forgive her.
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Post by Jan and Shah on May 22, 2015 2:05:35 GMT -5
I know you are upset with Cricket but, as others have said, she was only doing what nature intended her to do. I know it is hard, but please spend a little time with her. No matter how mad you are with her, she couldn't control what she did. She wont understand why you are mad with her.
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Post by biteybird on May 22, 2015 6:19:52 GMT -5
I don't have anything constructive to add to what's been said, except that I'm very sorry for what you've gone through with this situation.
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Post by kalipso2 on May 22, 2015 11:24:37 GMT -5
Well, Cricket laid another egg yesterday. That makes 3 eggs now. He's averaging one egg every four days. This last egg was huge and hopefully the last! I know it's not his fault and I still love him. I've loved him since I first laid eyes on him. He was 4 weeks old and the first baby quaker I held...and the only baby quaker I held because he picked ME by jumping back to me after I tried handing him back. We are bonded forever. I'm angry with him. I'm angry at myself. I'm even angry at Alistair.
After this last egg, Cricket seems to have calmed down a LOT. He asked for a kiss and I hesitated... not because I didn't want to kiss him but I didn't want him to bite me! He didn't though. It's going to take me a bit to trust him again. He's done nothing but attack me for a month now. The bites on my hands are proof of that.
I continue to sit outside his cage and talk to him. He'll fly to me when he's ready to be friends again. I miss Alistair SO much. It's so quiet without him. I caught Cricket looking for him yesterday so maybe we all miss him.
Thanks for being so supportive!!
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Post by aaron on May 22, 2015 12:03:41 GMT -5
I wonder if Cricket is aware of what he/she did or if she doesn't realize how much she hurt Alistair. I always wonder what birds' capacity for remorse is... It seems fairly limited. Glad she seems to be calming down. What are you doing with the eggs after they are laid?
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Post by julianna on May 22, 2015 14:00:20 GMT -5
You make me smile when you talk about the eggs... HE laid... sorry... but it is cute.
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