pamela
Hatchling
Blue Quaker female Kui
Posts: 10
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Post by pamela on Jul 28, 2018 10:29:08 GMT -5
Hi everyone! My problem may be over bonding. Kui loves me, cuddles, steps up and lets me scratch her head. My husband? No way! If he tries to have her step up she automatically opens her mouth and crouches down ready to bite. If she’s out and running around the back of our couch she will mostly stay clear but has come and bitten his ear. I’ve tried getting him involved with her care, let him feed her, but she is still a little monster to him. I’m at home all day with her and love her dearly, she is almost 4 months now. I Want a friendly bird and I’m not sure how to not overbond with her if I’m alone with her everyday?
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Post by biteybird on Aug 13, 2018 5:16:02 GMT -5
You've just experienced the problem that most quaker 'parronts' come across at some point or other. Welcome to the club! Why do they do it? You're right, it's related to bonding to one preferred person and being jealous of the other... You are with her all day, but - I have to ask - is she out of the cage the whole time? If so, maybe you should consider not letting her out while you're home. Your husband could let her out and spend time with her when he gets home. But I suggest that you go "out" while this happens, even if it's only for 30-60mins. Maybe go shopping and let them bond while you're not there. Hope this helps.  |
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pamela
Hatchling
Blue Quaker female Kui
Posts: 10
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Post by pamela on Aug 17, 2018 22:48:01 GMT -5
Thank you biteybird ! I’m sort of relieved to know this is somewhat common with quakers. I love her to pieces but want her to be a good companion to my husband as well! I think this is good advice, giving them time alone. Yes, she is out most of the day with me alone, so I spoil her |
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Post by dinucci on Aug 17, 2018 23:11:35 GMT -5
Ya know it comes to mind that perhaps she is just demanding attention from him as well. Buddy is like that to me sometimes,but he's 17 months. In my house,buddy believes my girlfriend is his mate. He guards her like a dog would should I show her any affection hahah..but I am also able to turn the tables with a treat,and some playtime while he's dialed into her. So yeah he should find ways to distract her and redirect her attention to something fun. Once she drops her guard,he will be able to do everything you do with her..but yes,1 on 1 time would be best for now. I say this a lot,but it's the holy grail with me and buddy. Make a couple t stands. Mine are made of a 2x6 base with 3/4 inch dowel rods. 1 screw for the vertical dowel from the bottom,and 1 thru the horizontal dowel countersunk. No food cups,toys ect. This way,when she perches,you have her undivided attention. I place them on a tv tray and a roll cart. Have her fly from stand to stand for treats to start out..not so far between to start out so she gets the picture. They're great for trick training too. Soon,like me,he will be viewed as Mr fun. They also learn to tall and sing easier when undistracted. One of the best trust and bond building ways I've found.
Best wishes !
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pamela
Hatchling
Blue Quaker female Kui
Posts: 10
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Post by pamela on Aug 20, 2018 9:14:09 GMT -5
@dinucci yes! I have been giving my husband special treats to feed Kui to gain her trust and also, since he has been bitten several times, to help my husband gain confidence with her! I agree with the stand, I have a little portable stand with nothing on it and when she is on it she has full attention on the one in front of her. She is still so young I’m hoping it’s not too hard to get them to be buddies of some sort  |
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Post by pidgesmum on Dec 5, 2018 19:14:13 GMT -5
This is a problem once they have bonded with one person. I have had different house mates who have suffered. He stalks them. I clipped his wings to make it more manageable.
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Post by waterloggedfun on Feb 21, 2019 11:21:33 GMT -5
Hi there. I know this is a few months late but hopefully still helpful. Pamela, have you tried target training Kui? It is a great way for your husband to interact with Kui in a positive way without risk of getting bitten. If you're interested in this, here's how it would go:
Things you need: chopstick & clicker (available at pet stores for under $1)
See this video for visual example:
This is usually learned in 2 - 3 five minute sessions. In my experience, it ALWAYS works when done correctly. Wish you the best!
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