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Post by beccilouise on Feb 12, 2016 12:45:51 GMT -5
Hello everyone,
A quick question from a concerned parront. Byron and I are going to visit my brother in Chichester in a couple of weeks so Byron can star in some music for my new spoken word show. We're going to record some of the noises he makes.
My brother lives with a few housemates. I asked him if they used any non-stick, aerosol/air fresheners, scented candles or incense and he said yes, all of them. I asked if it would be ok to avoid those things for 24 hours while Byron was there. He said he could do that in his room but didn't feel he could ask him housemates to do that. Do you think it's reasonable for me to ask that incense and air fresheners are avoided in communal spaces in the house for the weekend for Byron's sake? If not, I'll have to cancel the trip as I really don't want to put Byron at risk for the sake of a recording trip. I'll just have to record him on my iPhone and my brother can use that recording on the music.
Would be a shame to cancel the trip, but better safe than sorry.
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Post by julianna on Feb 12, 2016 14:14:41 GMT -5
Personally I do not think it is unreasonable to ask... the worst that can happen is they say no. As far as the frying pan goes... just make sure Byron is no where near the kitchen when it is being used and also... the frying pan is only dangerous if it is heating really high with nothing cooking in it. If they are just frying some food... it should be okay.
Also... when Oscar goes to the sitters she does have candles burning. I do not like the idea however, her birds are fine so I have not asked her to put it out. Air fresheners and incense can be a problem. If his housemates have a heart... I am sure 24 hours will not be a problem to stop.
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Post by aaron on Feb 12, 2016 15:41:49 GMT -5
Certainly not unreasonable to ask. I can definitely understand why you wouldn't want Byron in that environment. Personally, I wouldn't go unless they comply... 24 hours isn't a long time to refrain from using these things.
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Post by beccilouise on Feb 12, 2016 18:55:05 GMT -5
I'm not going to go unless they are happy not to use air fresheners, incense and aerosol in communal areas. It's just not worth the risk. If they aren't happy to do that we'll just have to find another place to record. I'm not putting my bird at risk, no question. Thanks for the advice guys.
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Post by biteybird on Feb 12, 2016 21:16:34 GMT -5
I agree with the others that it's not unreasonable to ask...I'm guessing most people wouldn't mind adjusting their habits for 24 hours. Good luck!  |
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Post by Caseysmom on Feb 12, 2016 22:02:01 GMT -5
Oh I hope your brother will ask them, they might surprise him and want to try to be bird friendly so you can go.
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Post by beccilouise on Feb 13, 2016 7:17:21 GMT -5
I hope so too! I had a bit of a rubbish morning to be honest, with partner saying (not unreasonably) that he felt I spent more time with the bird than with him. The balance is really difficult. I feel guilty about Byron being on his own and so want to give him as much love and affection as I can but am also aware that if I spend loads of time with him one day and then can't spend that time with him another day it will be confusing for him. I also love my partner very much and don't want to ruin everything. It's hard, because Byron has also become an extremely important part of my life, but I don't want that to overtake or overshadow my relationship. I guess we still haven't had him that long and we're still figuring out how to deal with it. The current plan is two hours in the morning (with Byron) and two hours in the evening at weekends, and then I see him in the evenings on weekdays and he goes to bed at nine o'clock (which gives him 12 hours sleep) and we have an hour and a half before we have to go to bed. I guess this means that birdie gets the time out his cage and attention that he needs, and my partner doesn't want to leave me for a birdless woman. Byron's cage is STUFFED with toys and he's pretty good at playing on his own. We leave the radio on for him when he's in his room, his cage is huge and he has bunny all day for entertainment and company. Please tell me this is ok and I'm doing the right thing. I desperately want my bird to be ok and my boyfriend to be ok and my bunny to be ok and generally everyone around me to be ok and it's hard and I've been suffering on and off with migraines for the last week because it's hard to make sure everyone is ok.  |
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Post by easttex on Feb 13, 2016 7:43:44 GMT -5
That balance is hard when a partner doesn't share the interest. I have the same situation. We are both home most of the time, and my grey, in particular, gets on my husband's nerves. Allie is also the one who gave him a bite that he'll never completely forgive.
I keep both of my birds in the living room most of the day. They're part of the family there, but except for some snuggle time whenever Peppy is up for it, I'm not handling either one of them all that much. I take them back to their room for an hour or so after lunch, since DH sometimes likes to nap at this time. They are then in the living room until after dinner, when I take them to their room and hang out with them. This works for us, and both of my birds have settled into the routine pretty well. If Allie does start acting badly and shows no sign of letting up, I will take her back to the bird room for a while. It's accommodation, not punishment. Their individual-focus time is not extensive, but they have company almost all the time.
It sounds like you are doing the best you can under the circumstances, but if you could negotiate a way to keep Byron more often in the thick of things, I think he'll be happier in the long run, even if you're not interacting directly with him.
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Post by beccilouise on Feb 13, 2016 9:49:01 GMT -5
Yes, you're right. It may well be that I also spend more time writing at my desk in the animal room, so that David can have the living room to himself a bit more. One of the issues is also that he feels a lot of 'space' is taken up by the bird in terms of play gyms etc. I guess if we could have a cage in the living room and one in Byron's sleeping room, that would be better, but I think I might have to go with this plan for a little bit to try and keep everybody happy. There are a few days when David is at work and I am at home to write, so Byron can spend more time with me then. Thank you, though, easttex, your solution is an interesting one and has given me some things to think about.
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Post by beccilouise on Feb 13, 2016 16:40:33 GMT -5
Doesn't look like the session is going to happen on the 28th Byron may still come with me to meet brother for a quick, out-of-the-house meeting, and then I think we're going to organise the recording session at another place in the Easter Holidays. It's a shame he won't ask, but my brother is quite nervous like that, so I'm not surprised. Oh well, would rather be safe than sorry! |
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Post by aaron on Feb 14, 2016 20:51:21 GMT -5
Bummer. I think you're right, though.. better safe than sorry.
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Post by biteybird on Feb 15, 2016 2:33:22 GMT -5
I agree; obviously your brother's not comfortable asking the question, so good not to put too much pressure on him or anyone else...it's a shame though, but hey, you'll both survive! |
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Post by beccilouise on Feb 15, 2016 8:00:36 GMT -5
Yeah, of course we will! To be honest, I'd rather this than take Byron to a potentially dangerous place and have anything happen to him. I've only had him 4 months but the idea of life without his squawking and craziness just does by bear thinking about! Strange how quickly they become part of your world, eh?
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Post by aaron on Feb 15, 2016 12:27:40 GMT -5
Become a part of it? You mean completely take over it? Yes, it happens very fast  |
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Post by beccilouise on Feb 15, 2016 13:17:58 GMT -5
Hahaha, too true!
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