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Post by msdani1981 on Feb 2, 2016 3:58:02 GMT -5
Hi all! Zach and I have been dealing with this for awhile, and I don't know how to handle it.
When I'm home by myself I let the birds out as much as possible. When Zach comes home I put them away so they won't escape, and they stay in their cages for awhile so he can relax.
The problem is, when he's home, Taz starts screaming. It's loud and high pitched and drives Zach crazy. We ignore it at first, then Zach says to me "Dani, talk to your bird, please!" and when that doesn't work Zach yells at Taz and finally gets up to cover the cage, at which point Taz shrieks his alarm call, which makes Zach even madder.
I have no idea what to do, but we have to do something because this scenario happens almost every day and triggers my anxiety.
Help!
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Post by biteybird on Feb 2, 2016 6:12:52 GMT -5
Hi Dani, I'm sorry you and Zach are going through this. I know what this is like, as we've been going through it for a while too, with Bonnie. Hubby has a short fuse and has noise sensitivity, so sometimes yells at her, which makes it worse... Taz is your cockatiel, right? They can be really loud (I hear our two easily from the outdoor aviary). Firstly, can you limit the birds' out of cage time so that they aren't out the entire time you're home? I guess I don't know how long you're home on a daily basis, but I found that this strategy worked well with Bonnie, in that she didn't take her out of cage time 'for granted'. Generally with Bonnie she doesn't get to come out of the cage until 2pm on weekend days and then only for a couple of hours. Secondly, would it be more relaxing for Zach to let Taz and/or the other birds out when he's home, rather than him trying to ignore the noise? Perhaps you could 'disappear' for 10 minutes, he could let Taz out for a short stint, then you return & talk to Taz before he gets put back in his cage...this would be after Taz has already had some out-of-cage time during Zach's absence (so Taz will still have had his exercise & interaction). I know this is a really difficult situation! I've found Bonnie's behavior has improved slightly with hubby when he made more effort to have meaningful interaction with her - there's been no choice in the past few days, as I've had to stay back at school and have been getting home at 6pm, so he's let her out with positive results. If I think of anything else I'll repost...meanwhile, know that you're not alone!  It can be very distressing when one's partner can't cope with what's going on. |
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Post by Caseysmom on Feb 2, 2016 9:38:55 GMT -5
Yup, cockatiels can get loud. I agree it might be an idea for Zachary to let Taz out, he might just calm down and not screech. I know of a similar situation and the only way I could get the Tiel to stop screaming and not get covered up by its owner was to get it a stand and let the bird hang out outside his cage visiting. Now this Tiel is 16 and content for the most part to hang out on the stand and get head rubs. Before we got the stand I used to give him a dish of special treats to eat to keep him busy and not scream and bother his owner. But once he finished he would screech again. It' does seem true, men are more bothered, I really don't hear them as something to be annoyed about, just background noise.
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Post by aaron on Feb 2, 2016 14:21:33 GMT -5
Does Taz still scream when you sit near the cage? I don't know how your cages are positioned, but I've found that Cupcake will typically accept cage time in silence as long as we hang out near the cage while she's in there. It might not last forever, but I can often get an hour of peaceful silence that way. But generally speaking it's less stressful to have her out of the cage than to try to figure out how to keep her in the cage while we are home. She doesn't take to that very well.
Otherwise, I think biteybird has some great suggestions up there... These kinds of situations are very challenging. I'm the one in our house that has the most trouble with the noise. I don't yell about it but it definitely stresses me out and I am not really able to tune it out.
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Post by Jan and Shah on Feb 2, 2016 15:23:48 GMT -5
Yelling at any animal will get you nowhere - they will either scream louder to outdo you or you instil a sense of fear in them. I agree with what others have said - get Zach to let Taz out when he comes home. I also like the idea of a stand to pop Taz on when he is out. One more thing - Taz will pick up on your stress levels - it wont improve the situation. Deep breath Dani - talk to Zach about the options and see which one he prefers. I quite understand that the noise can be extremely irritating but I found (with Shah) that when he is like this, I approach his cage and talk quietly to him - it might take a little while but he does quieten down. Good luck.
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Post by easttex on Feb 2, 2016 19:28:50 GMT -5
I always come back to Barbara: goodbirdinc.blogspot.com/2008/05/stop-you-parrot-from-screaming-for.htmlIf you can approach it methodically, always respond the same way, and don't get riled up (or allow anyone else to ), I think you can extinguish the behavior. It does require a lot of effort and consistency. And time, of course. edit: I shouldn't say extinguish entirely, because you know fish gotta swim, birds gotta squawk sometimes. |
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It can be very distressing when one's partner can't cope with what's going on.
