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Post by beccilouise on Jan 10, 2016 13:21:09 GMT -5
Hello again everyone, I have a few questions about Quaker bonding. So, Byron is nearly 7 months old now and gets lots of attention, mostly from me. When David is home, he will sit on David's finger and give him kisses. He is friendly to everyone and does seem to like David. However, if I leave the room, he will squeal until I come back and sometimes will try to fly after me. If there are new and unfamiliar people around, it's me he wants to sit with, though he is happy to sit with David if I am not at home. If David hugs or kisses me, he immediately wants to kiss me straight after and he wants to eat whatever is on my plate, but is rarely bothered about what David is eating.
I know Byron is very young, and will not display any adolescent bonding behavior until he is a year or a year and a half old. I also know that some birds have been known to change their minds about their favourite person when they hit adolescence. Although it's unlikely, it's not unheard of. Obviously, if Byron decides he loves David and hates me, I will be disappointed, but he will still be my bird and always have a place in my life. My worries about this are as follows: - if this happens and (highly unlikely, but just in case) something goes wrong with my and David's relationship, Byron will have to come with me. I genuinely cannot foresee this happening, but never say never. - When I travel, Byron will be coming with me as he is my bird.
How will he cope with these things if he is away from the person he has bonded to? At the moment, he seems very attached to me and I have been trying very hard to make sure he has interacting with lots of different people so he doesn't overbond to anyone. I'm hoping this will help lessen the likelihood of stress if he is away from his favourite person. Is there anything else I can do about this? What have other people's experiences of this been?
Thanks guys. |
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Post by aaron on Jan 10, 2016 20:03:47 GMT -5
Well, we can only guess how he'd react being separated from David if he happened to decide that David was suddenly his favorite person, but my guess is that he would be okay. There could be an initial period of contact calling and distress, but I would expect him to adjust fairly quickly. He knows you, and even if he had a sudden affair with David, I think he would probably fall back on his past connection to you if David became absent.
It sounds like you are doing great trying to keep him socialized with people other than yourself, and it sounds like things are going well between him and David! The more flexible you can make him when it comes to being social, the easier these potential transitions will be.
Bottom line is that these birds are very adaptable. Worst case scenario you're looking at a somewhat rough period of adjustment, but there's no doubt that he would ultimately be okay. I don't think there's much to be concerned about.
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Post by beccilouise on Jan 11, 2016 11:34:33 GMT -5
Thanks Aaron, I'm sure you're right. Essentially the aim is to ensure he is conditioned to be as friendly as possible to all the humans he has regular contact with, which is what I'm trying to achieve at the moment. That way, whoever his long-term birdie best friend is, we can all get along as well as possible and I will at least be able to feed and handle him without losing fingers! Ultimately, he spends the vast majority of his time with me, so I'm sure this won't be an issue, but I'd really hate for him to be unhappy. Thank you for the reassurance. You're right, they are hardy little birds and I'm sure he'll be fine  |
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Post by aaron on Jan 11, 2016 11:54:30 GMT -5
Of course. I think you're on the right track with all of this. He's a lucky little birdie to have you. |
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Post by easttex on Jan 11, 2016 14:50:24 GMT -5
I agree with Aaron that it's likely that Byron will adapt. It's a harder thing when you break a bond to rehome a parrot - just too much trauma all at once, maybe. But I think parrots are pretty much realists in their outlook. Even if previously bonded to someone else in the household, if he knows you and trusts you already, he probably won't want to be without a loving relationship for long.
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Post by julianna on Jan 11, 2016 16:43:05 GMT -5
You know.... it is amazing how well these birds can adjust... just given the right home and circumstances. Oscar lived with another couple for two years... and yes he bonded with them... and it broke their hearts to have to give him to someone else... but he adjusted. Lots of love and attention... and he is well adjusted. He loves me more than anything... and when his previous owner comes to visit... he will go to her... but not for long. It is me who is his Mom.
If anything should happen in your relationship... and God hope it does not... your little one will adjust to the outcome. We always hope that never have to... but with the right new parents... it is Okay. Love prevails.
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Post by beccilouise on Jan 11, 2016 18:06:16 GMT -5
Thanks everyone. This is really reassuring David and I are extremely happy together and I really cannot foresee this happening, but I also know that family break ups are one of the main reasons for rehoming parrots and, unlikely as it is, you can never tell what's just round the corner. But if Byron is happy to come away with me when I travel for a few days, and won't get stressed or miserable, then I'm sure the two of us can adapt to whatever life throws at us! Someone on the forum said to me that these little feathered dinosaurs have a way of winning you over. David picked up Byron today and said to him 'd'you know what, Byron? You're my favourite bird.' WHAT a turn around! Something tells me my little family are all going to be ok! |
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Post by aaron on Jan 11, 2016 20:10:19 GMT -5
Awww, that's great! They certainly do have a way of winning you over, that is for sure. So glad David and Byron are coming along so nicely |
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